By GRETA OHAUS and ELENI TOUBANOS
From mid-December to New Year’s Day, we all find ourselves attending dinner parties, ugly sweater parties, awkward office parties, awkward family gatherings, cookie exchanges, secret Santa reveals, Santacons and fancy galas with chic after parties (okay, not everyone, but two girls can dream). With the holiday (and party) spirit in mind, we end up answering the age old question, “If you could invite any historical or fictional figure that has ever existed to a party at your apartment who would it be?”
ET: The O.G. queen (literally) of glitter and glamour to me is Cleopatra. The Queen of the Nile would be carried on a gilded pedestal, mainly because she couldn’t walk in her skin tight gold gown and Chloe shoes.
GO: Wow, can totally see that… and being honest, I would be so jealous because you know how much I love attention. Not to mention she would beeline to Cary Grant, the king of 1940s glamour, who would obviously be wearing a beautiful wool suit, a black foulard tie, red pocket square, Gucci fur lined loafers and that stunningly handsome smile.
ET: I’m all about women with initiative, but I would gravitate more to the wallflower type. I’d try to corner John Steinbeck and discuss Grapes of Wrath. While sipping my own grapes of wrath, I’d gently stroke his frayed corduroy blazer. He’d probably be more into Georgia O’Keefe who would be wearing an inappropriately casual Anthropologie dress with purple tights and Dansko clogs. I guess my feathered dress would intimidate his more shabby chic aesthetic.
GO: Feathers for you and sparkles for me! I would ask Sienna Miller to borrow her Thakoon red jumpsuit from the Met Gala last year, I guess that means we would have to invite her too?
ET: Sure, why not? I feel like she would weirdly hit it off with Nancy Drew who would be wearing an embroidered cape. She wouldn’t take it off, because she would probably sneak out of the party early for “curfew.”
GO: But before she left I would obviously be forced into taking a slightly blurry, but “with-a-filter-will-look-fine” instagram of you two and the rest of your #squad, i.e. Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss… We all know you’re part of that.
ET: We all baked the vegan, gluten-free, sugar-free sugar cookies together. Your squad, Winona Ryder (circa the 90’s) and Gwyneth Paltrow, would be clad in pantsuits and drinking gin and tonics garnished with rosemary. 100 percent, Gwen is wearing a white, low-cut Calvin Klein number.
GO: Style differences aside, we’d all come together for the toast from the British Prime Minister — not the real one (no offense David Cameron), the Hugh Grant from Love Actually one. At this point, we’re all warmly embracing each other, sparkle in our drinks, on our dresses and in our eyes?
ET: Somehow I’d end the night dancing with Holly Golightly and Cat…
GO: …to Justin Bieber and Frank Sinatra, who of course we convinced to do a special duet performance of “Mistletoe” in our cramped two-bedroom apartment in Chelsea.
ET: So cramped that I could easily snap a picture of you and James Bond, in nothing less than a tuxedo, making out under the Mistletoe.
Obviously if you’ve been reading our column all semester, you would get an invite too. Happy holidays and happy last week of classes!
We share a major, we share a house, we share clothes. So why not share a column? Eleni Toubanos and Greta Ohaus are both Fiber Science & Apparel Design majors in the College of Human Ecology. Their column is intended to be a conversation between their two unique perspectives as a designer and fiber scientist. They can be found lounging around campus, on their porch sharing a bottle of wine or at email@example.com and firstname.lastname@example.org. Talk is Chic appears on alternate Tuesdays this semester.
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