Don’t have a Goodwill near you? Can’t afford to independently wear down some white sneakers via walking in them, as one does? Been longing for goose-themed shoes to pair with your unethically manufactured goose-feather jacket? May I present to you the Golden Goose Superstar sneakers.
Stroking your classically Cornellian fetish for advertising your parents’ New English wealth, while also saving you the time and energy your freshman School of Hotel Administration schedule simply cannot accommodate to break into a new pair of white Vans, having your very own GG pair will grant your feet that special sensation of chafing against five-hundred-dollar leather that has been individually hand-scratched and artistically ravaged in a Venetian warehouse. An undoubtedly worthwhile investment, one pair of GGs is all you’ll ever need to satisfy your inexplicable desire for a chestnut brown blemish thoughtfully placed on your rightmost toe by a nice Italian man.