At this point in my budding blog I should probably add that these posts are not jokes—they are meant to highlight the contradictions surrounding campus life. Ahh, The Greek Reformer. Is it a magazine? Is it an underground religious organization during the Hellenistic period of ancient Greece? No, The Greek Reformer, in fact, is just like a regular Cornellian who roams the quads and complains about prelims. What distinguishes this Cornellian, though, is the gap between what he or she thinks versus what he or she puts into practice.

BIWEEKLY JOKES FOR EVERYDAY FOLKS | How Cornell Markets Liberal Arts

It really is something to chuckle at, the way Cornell speaks about liberal arts. Specifically within the College of Arts and Sciences, there exists an issue with the rhetoric surrounding our breadth and depth requirements, which I argue stems from our grade-centered education. Ideally, I would care much more about the quality of my education, about my intellectual growth each semester, than I do about my grades. Unfortunately, I am hyper aware of the importance of my grades—their influence on how others view and judge me—and their influence on my future. Whether or not I learn a lot in a class, I have been trained since high school to desire outside recognition of my accomplishments in that class.


Part I: The Drive Up
I remember quite clearly my drive up to Cornell in the summer of 2016. It was a lovely day on both ends of my trip—the Upper West Side wishing me good luck in the coming year with a warm, blue sky and Ithaca welcoming me with open arms as its sky held in its bladder to save rain for those driving up from New Jersey. It had been a wonderful summer. I worked as a counselor for five year olds. I went to dinner with my family.

TRAVELIN’ WITH JACQUELINE | Soundtrack to My Freshman Year

This entire summer, I’ve been dreading the day that Fall 2017 starts because it will signal the beginning of the second half of my college experience. As I’m honing in on exactly what I should do at the start of this second half, I’ve been reminiscing and reconsidering all the things I did at the start of the first half, by which I mean: freshman year. And so, I’ve decided to create a “greatest hits” article of my starkest memories from freshman year. Now, there’s really no rhyme or reason to my recollections, but I’m hoping you all will find at least one of them interesting if not entertaining! Track 1: “Dirty Laundry” by Carrie Underwood

So I’m still not sure how long parents usually stay in Ithaca when sending off their newborn Cornellians, but my parents stayed for a week to eat and hike around Ithaca after they moved me in.

SERENDIPITY | 5 Survival Tips and Tricks for New Cornell Students

Cornell is a difficult place – colloquially, we are known as the easiest Ivy to get into… but the hardest to graduate from. While many of you are among the swaths of high school valedictorians, science fair winners and speech and debate aficionados, all of you will certainly fail at some point in your college careers. Whether you be staring at your grades with a terrible kind of awe, realizing three days later that you never turned in (or started) your final essay, or getting sent to the hospital for drinking too much during O-Week, Cornell will crush your souls in every way, shape and form. But worry not! After pressing on through four years in this frozen wasteland, you will emerge as elite graduates who have a remarkable capacity to change the world for the better.

BANDI | A Big Red Ball

One of my formative orientation week events was Big Red Ball. For those of you who don’t know what Big Red Ball is, don’t worry—it’s really simple. All you need is two goal posts, a large open space and a ball. The rules are almost exactly like those of soccer, except instead of a small, black and white ball you use a big red ball. Like you know those big inflated balls you see in the Walmart children’s section, held inside a standing container with rubber straps so you could pull the balls out from the bottom and throw them back over the top?

ARRAY | “That’ll Never Happen To Me”

When I teetered into my dorm room on the first day, weighed down by three bags I had lugged across the country, I wasn’t inspired by any sense of new beginning despite all the people offering me their collegiate wisdom and telling me that my life had just begun. I missed home, I missed Mom, I felt like I was still just me, packed up and shipped 3000 miles away. By that point, sitting in my dorm room, I believed, with one-hundred percent certainty, that I had taken all those pieces of advice I had  received left and right to heart. I had been told I deserved this, and I believed I did. I had been told to wear sunscreen and to find a path and stick to it, but to keep looking for other ones, and be okay with switching destinations in the middle, so long as I had a goal in sight.

SUNSPOTS | 10 Things To Do During O-Week While Everyone Else Is Out Partying

If you’re not one of those people who shows up to Ithaca waaaaay too excited about going to their first college party, have no fear. Your options for activities during O-Week are endless! 1. Make a late-night run to Nasties
Jeremiah Kim: The first few days of O-Week might be the only time that Bear Necessities (Nasties) in RPCC won’t be mobbed by throngs of drunken revelers clamoring to fix their munchies with a Bo Burger or Fried Platter, simply because most freshmen aren’t even aware that such a place exists—yet. Take advantage of this momentary lull in traffic to satisfy your most urgent midnight cravings and enjoy that heavenly burger in sweet, sweet solitude.