If you haven’t read the news yet, this year’s Slope Day headliners will be MisterWives and Big Gigantic, with Brasstracks and S’Natra also performing. Our writers share their immediate reactions to finding out the lineup.
Gabe Ares ‘19
When I heard that the Slope Day headliners were about to be announced, I, much like the squirrel awakened from hibernation, dug into my stash of memes I had been hoarding since last Slope Day. I looked through my musical meme folder, from Andre 3000 to the Zac Brown band, only to realize I had no idea who these people were. At first, I felt short-changed by the fact that we didn’t get a superstar, but listening to the groups tells me they’re nothing to cry about. MisterWives is actually pretty good – their best songs have a kind of Portugal the Man sound with Lorde-esque vocals – and if the coordinators were looking for The Chainsmokers lite, I think they found it in Big Gigantic.
Sasha Chanko ‘19
Slope Day Programming Board presents:
* A Spinoff Of The Hit TLC Show, Sister Wives
* Our Name Is Definitely Compensating For Our Lack Of Musical Talent
with special guests
* It’s Like Moose Tracks, But It’s Not Ice Cream And It’s Bad
* Not Frank Sinatra #NotMyS’Natra
We basically sacrificed some of our budget for the artists to pay for higher medical expenses, because students will need to drink more to have fun with this lineup.
Hunter Moskowitz ‘18
That was my entire reaction to announcement of the Slope Day artists. Look, I understand that the Slope Day committee has severe budget constraints and needs to balance pressures from people with vastly different musical preferences, but all I’m asking for is one song on Slope Day that I could pretend to sing along to. Now I guess I must spend the next couple months listening to groups I have never heard of and probably will never hear again, just to make the concert worth it.
On the other hand, it’s Slope Day, so it probably doesn’t matter who’s singing or what they’re singing anyway.
Jeremiah Kim ‘19
Funny that you ask, but when I saw that Big Gigantic was headlining I gave an inner leap for joy because I have always been of the opinion that Extra Redundant adjectives don’t get enough credit in the band-name-making industry (Large Enormous? Huge Humongous? The mind reels with the possibilities). And, to top it off, we get 4 off-brand Macklemores + 1 off-brand Paramore lead singer + 1 teenage Adam Sandler for the price of 0.3 name-brand Macklemores? Talk about hitting the jackpot!
Evan Kravitz ‘19
My immediate reaction to finding out the Slope Day artists was opening up my web browser and Googling information about these artists. I then had a physics prelim to take, so I couldn’t dwell too long on the topic. It turns out I have no idea who these artists are. Fortunately, Slope Day is less about the specific artists and more about the atmosphere of the day.
Charlie Liao ‘18
I got sad and started listening to the artists I wish they were… Nickleback and Andrea Bocelli.
Yang Lu ‘18
I think I reacted the same way almost everyone reacted at first… “Who the heck are these people?” But after giving all of the artists some listens on YouTube and Spotify, I found that they aren’t too bad. We can only wait and see, but in the meantime, I’ll stay optimistic. Why not?
Lev Akabas ‘19
When my friend broke the news to me about this year’s Slope Day artists, I misheard him and thought he said “The headliner is Big Gigantic MisterWives,” to which I responded, “Wow, that’s a really dope name for a band,” to which he responded, “Which one?” to which I responded, “I thought you said Big Gigantic MisterWives,” to which he responded, “Nah, there are two groups. One is named Big Gigantic, and the other is named MisterWives,” to which I responded, “Well now it’s just two really boring names for a band,” to which he responded, “Yeah,” to which I responded, “Oh well,” and then we both went on with our lives.